At Captured Emotions we were very lucky. Aside from losing power for five days, we sustained no permanent damage, lost no files, and while we couldn’t work on weddings with no power, we took the extra time to be with our families and mourn the loss of so many things here in the Binghamton area. Please be patient with us as we work on catching up on emails and posting pictures.

If you or your loved ones have lost your Captured Emotions wedding album or wedding pictures, please let us know. We are not a large enough company to  replace hundreds of portraits and albums for free, but we would love the chance to see what we can do toward replacing your memories.

If you or your loved ones were not affected by the flood, but you read our blog and would like to help those that were, please visit one of the following sites to consider making a donation or offer of help.

Binghamton Flood (community support page) on Facebook

Our10.org

God bless. Stay dry. Give generously if you are able.

Previously, we posted tips for surviving the bouquet/garter toss as a bridesmaid. This week we are taking a step back to prepare you from the beginning of the preparation process. So here goes….

Congratulations! Your friend/relative/acquaintance has asked  you to be in your wedding. Here are some tips for making this transition from everyday-person to Bridesmaid extraordinaire:

1. Look at your calendar. Hard. There is nothing worse than agreeing to be in a wedding and having to back out last-minute because you forgot it was your brother’s graduation day or your mom had a scheduled surgery, or you already paid a down-payment on a cabin in Michigan. Check your calendar and then write/type the wedding into the calendar so you don’t schedule anything else.

2. Be realistic about the finances. Weddings are expensive, but you may not have realized what type of financial commitment you just made so I want to break it down for you. The average bridesmaid’s dress is $150 unless your bride doesn’t care at all about committing your money and then you are in trouble. But plan to spend $100-$200 for a dress, and $30 for shoes. This is not usually included in the wedding budget since you get to keep your dress and shoes after the wedding, so you are on your own. Additionally, plan to be at the wedding at minimum two days before, the day of, and the day after the wedding. So that’s at least 4 days of doing nothing but helping out the bride. You have to be able to attend the rehearsal, typically the night before, and there may be a bachelorette party the night before that. This means you have to take vacation days from work, or go without pay if you don’t have any paid vacation time coming. Now add in travel. If you are lucky, the wedding is close to where you live, but if not, add in cost for flight/gas, hotel stays, car rental, meals etc. Finally, factor in the cost of gifts: engagement party, shower, bachelorette party, wedding gifts.

Feeling overwhelmed? You don’t have to be, you can do this on a budget, but you do need to be honest about expense vs. income and try to work with the bride and other bridesmaids if you need help. For instance, as a bridesmaid I have had many brides find me a place to stay when I was coming from out-of-town, frequently in their house with them up until the wedding night. Some brides will let you wear your own shoe selection, as long as it is the appropriate color, which means you can look for a cheaper version or use something you already own. Gifts can be made, rides can be shared, your boss may allow you to take on extra shifts if you plan ahead. But don’t take on more financial responsibility than you can fiscally chew.

3. Disclose early if you have special needs. As a bride, I chose all of my bridesmaids carefully and would not have wanted a single one to be left out, but some of them required special accommodations and lucky for me they told me in time for me to do something about it. I am not just talking about physical disabilities, although now is the time to disclose that your false leg doesn’t bend at the knee, but other needs you may not have thought of right away, such as:

- Modesty requirements for your religion or to cover up a scar, etc.

- Allergies (especially to specific types of flowers or metals)

- Stage fright/fear of public speaking

- Preferences (if you hate to show your arms and would rather have sleeves, think your knees are ugly and need a long gown, have a preference for a type of material or a type of dress cut, delicately bring these up. Most brides want you to love your bridesmaid dress and want to wear it again. If you don’t speak up now, you will have to forever hold your peace).

4. Offer to help. Often. In ways that are as specific as possible. Wedding planning is stressful and full of crazy little details so if you can take any of the work off the bride’s hands, she will be so grateful, but she may be so overwhelmed she doesn’t even know where to start. You don’t need prior experience to be super helpful: anybody can stuff invitation envelopes, seal them, put stamps on them, and mail them out. Someone slightly more organized can easily maintain the RSVP list on a spreadsheet. You don’t have to be craftsy to stuff doily cones full of flower petals, all you need are hands. I attended one wedding as the wife of a groomsman, and discovered that not one of the bride’s 8 bridesmaids who actually lived in the area took the day off work on the day before her wedding. Which meant that three of us spent all day decorating her backyard for the rehearsal dinner luau, cleaning up afterwards, stuffing rose petals into cones, and one of us WASN’T EVEN IN THE WEDDING PARTY. Be classy, help out. I am sure those ladies never even thought about the fact that she would need help, but 10 years later it still ruffles my feathers how insensitive they were to their friend’s needs.

5. Get contact info for all the bridesmaids distributed to each other ASAP. This is usually the maid of honor’s job, but you guys will want to be in on planning showers and bachelorette parties and it is nice to get to know each other before the big day.

6. Get the bride something small. The night I got engaged, my friends knew it was going to happen and my roommate left my first Bridal magazine on my pillow. It was the icing on the cake of one of the best nights of my life. One of the things many brides fear is losing all their friends after they get married. Let her know from the beginning that you support her and will be there for her, and then follow it up by actually being there.

Those 6 tips should get you started. On to the fun parts….

Yesterday was Labor Day – and while my mind immediately jumps to the maternity version of labor whenever I hear the name of the holiday, this day is not about moms, but about all the workers (male and female) who give their lives to make this country, and specifically New York’s Southern Tier, a great place to live and get married. Thank you to all those often unsung heroes whose labor makes this life beautiful. Thank you.

As a former bridesmaid myself, I feel for you ladies. You shell out a couple hundred dollars of your hard earned money on a dress you will probably never wear again, and may regret having to wear the first time, you take time off work, travel across the country (and sometimes the world), and all for the honor of trying to not be as pretty as the bride. It is a pretty thankless job which often involves a lot of grunt work and emotional triage. But it is such a huge honor that you accepted all the woes and responsibilities out of love for your friend/relative. Now, there are two big problems in your future we hope to help you overcome with grace.

Problem 1: the bouquet toss
Typically, either you are desperately hoping to catch the bouquet and be the next in line to play bride, or you are desperately hoping to avoid catching that thing at all costs.

Tips for catching it:
1. Stand in front: most brides don’t throw far enough so you may have to dive. Watch out for ten year olds who always get to stand in front because they are short. If your bride is a softball player, this rule does not apply.

2. Just tell the bride you want to catch it and maybe she will turn around and aim it right at you.

3. If all else fails, get your pepper spray ready to beat down any girl that gets between you and being the next bridezilla. (Disclaimer: we don’t think you should do this. It isn’t worth it)

Avoiding the bouquet: This is an art-form frankly, especially if your boyfriend catches the garter and you’ve been together for a while but you just aren’t ready to commit. We have also been to weddings where everyone avoided the bouquet and it just sat like a lump on the floor with no one willing to touch it. Definitely not cool.

How to avoid the bouquet gracefully (i.e. so the bride doesn’t know and feel bad):
1. Stand in the back behind a tall person. Then take off your heels. Short people rarely catch things in this situation.
2. Act like you are really trying for it but make your hands flat so even if you touch the bouquet it will bounce right off your hands and hopefully be caught by someone else more eager than you. You cannot catch things if you refuse to use your thumbs.
3. After deflecting the flowers, look at your hands as if you broke a nail or it bruised your finger and that way you look busy while others take “the prize”.

Problem 2: the garter placing
Ok, this tradition is just plain awkward. Random girl catches the bouquet (often a ten year old girl because they stand in front and brides, as aforementioned, often throw short) and random guy catches the garter. Now guy puts completely useless garter on the leg of the victim… er… winner of the bouquet…. yay… that’s not awkward at all. Seriously, why has this tradition stuck around? We don’t use those garters for anything!

Anyway, on the off chance that lucky girl is you, here’s our advice:

1. Sit in a chair. Do not, for example, sit on two groomsmen’s knees. A strange man is going to be putting undergarments on your thigh. It is up to you to keep this moment from spiraling out of control. Let’s say you sat on the groomsmen’s knees and they get the bright idea to stand up to help the guy get the garter on your leg. Worse, let’s say they aren’t supporting the top half of you very well and suddenly you find yourself at standing height, lying horizontally while you show the whole wedding party your undies, including the complete stranger who is forcing an elastic band around your thigh.

2. Sit up straight and lean forward. If you lean backwards, you will flash your undies to the entire reception. But, if you lean forward, then you limit the headroom strange garter man has and he will not place the garter too close to your special places. Think defensively ladies!

3. Lift you dress up the leg in question to the height you are comfortable showing. Otherwise he may decide he has to put his head under your skirt so he can see.

If this advice hasn’t made you change your mind about participating in the whole affair, and we hope it won’t, be on the lookout for more Bridesmaid tips in future blogs.

On Fridays we like to highlight something new or fun for a segment we call “Fun Idea Fridays” and this week, its all about including man (and woman’s) best friend in your wedding celebration - after all, they are an important part of the family.

A few great ideas for including your pets but not letting them take over your day:

1. Have a pet wrangler for any event your pets participate in. Including your pets in egagement sessions is becoming increasingly popular, but the number one problem is that you probably also want to take some pictures as a couple – which is nearly impossible if you don’t bring another adult who can care for your pets while you focus on being photographed. If you decide to include pets in your wedding, you will also need a pet wrangler for the entire day.

2. Choose the role your pets will play wisely – your barely housebroken chihuahua may be adorable, but he won’t make a good church ring bearer. Sometimes having them make an appearance in your ceremony and/or reception is all you need. Not all pets are comfortable in strange places in front of lots of strangers and you want this to be a great day for your pet as well. If you choose to make your pet a wedding attendant, have a person assist them down the aisle (on a pillow, in a wagon, or with a beautifully decorated leash). This ensures they won’t get out of control (or relieve themselves on your decorations).

3. Bring treats! Don’t forget your pet’s regular food/water/potty times and make sure that if you include him in the ceremony or reception that you have provided plenty of treats to let him know he is doing a good job

4. Have a rehearsal just for your pet to explore the space and practice – with lots of rewards – doing whatever you ask him to do.

5. Don’t keep your pets with you the whole time. They will be overwhelmed and need a break from all the excitement.

Pets are a wonderful part of your family and if you are considering making them a part of your engagement session or wedding, remember to take your pet’s needs into consideration as much as your own. After all, for some of us, pets are people too.

For taking pictures, a slightly overcast bright day is usually the perfect weather condition. If the sun is too bright, it makes the camera settings a bit of a challenge. If it is too dark and overcast, then we can’t capture that pure blue sky. But a nice amount of shade on a bright day hits the spot… usually.

What we discovered with Katie and Adam’s wedding, is that you don’t need to depend on the weather to have a bright sunshiny wedding.

Take one sunny bride, add one sunny groom, mix them up with a crowd of fun people who adore them and, voila – you have a wedding that makes its own sunshine. If you don’t believe me, just see for yourself.

Keep on making life bright and sunshiny Katie and Adam. We think you are off to a good start.

On Fridays we like to take a moment to talk about new and fun ideas in wedding planning, and we call it “Fun Idea Friday” – I know, super original title. This week is dedicated to the modern bride and her tattoo. It used to be that if you had a tattoo, it was expected that you would cover it up at a fancy event like a wedding. Depending where your ink lives, that could have meant anything from a cover up (long sleeves, shawls, gloves, etc.), to cover up (i.e. makeup to hide your tat). But as tattoos are becoming more socially acceptable, flaunting yours at your wedding becomes more acceptable as well. Our recommendation – be authentically you at your wedding.  Rather than covering your tattoo, there are lots of ways photographers can work around them, so they don’t show up in every picture. This may be of benefit for Mom or Grandma or your new Mother-in-Law who never approved in the first place.

You also might want to consider how formal your tattoos are and plan your wedding accordingly. Most tattoos will stick out much more at a country club black tie affair than they will at a casual outdoor ceremony. Some brides and grooms actually get tattoo wedding rings, or matching tattoos as part if their pre-bridal events.

So here are some fun pictures designed to show or shush the tattoo, whichever you prefer.

And these same brides, photographed the same day with no makeup or other tattoo hiding devices

If you are really into tattoos, you could follow Shannon’s lead. Her back tattoos were not entirely symmetrical so she asked a tattoo artist to come on her wedding day and use a sharpee to even out the tattoos for public viewing.

So stop stressing. Ink might just be the new pink.

Cookies, cupcakes, and pie – oh my! As a person who does not particularly enjoy cake, dessert at a wedding is often a disappointing affair. But, what if the whole reception was based on dessert, rather than serving a meal? Brittany and Josh did just that at their recent Binghamton, NY wedding, and it was a hit.

They chose desserts that were family favorites: apple and cherry pie, cupcakes, cookies, and of course a small wedding cake to cut, and then they set up stations where guests could help themselves.

They served the apple and cherry pie in adorable mason jars - how clever

The signs were very simple but super cute.

This is brilliant for several reasons:

1. This type of dessert reception is easy to tailor to any budget - and more unique than a traditional dinner. Plus, who doesn’t love dessert?

2. If you are planning an evening wedding, a dessert reception makes perfect sense as guests will want to eat before they come to the ceremony.

3. It is brilliant because it is personal. These were their favorite desserts, which helps you feel more intimate with the bride and groom and their families.

4. It is easy to make the reception feel more casual in this type of setting.

5. If you have a lot of local relatives who want to help, they can bake their favorite desserts (make sure this is ok with your venue/caterer)

If you have never thought about having a dessert reception before, we think this is a very classy twist on a traditional reception. Some other ideas we had to make it your own:

1. Add a coffee bar and a barista where guests can add liqueur to their coffees or flavored syrups. Perfect for dessert pairing and a version of an open bar that is much more affordable. My husband would have loved this at our own reception.

3. Have some savory appetizers or snacks to pair with all this sweet stuff

4. Not into coffee? Offer a wine bar that matches wine choices with the desserts folks choose.

5. Consider ice cream. It’s my favorite.

A dessert reception is a great way to keep your wedding budget reasonable and still offer your guests something unique and classy. We gave this one two big thumbs up for originality and creativity. Have your own ideas for a great dessert reception? Leave a comment and let us know!

To veil or not to veil, that is the first question. But if you decide the answer is you want some sort of wedding veil, the options are just beginning. So here are some pictures of veil types we have seen in the last few years, and some pros and cons to go with them.

This bride opted out of the veil quandary  all together. After all, the veil comes from a tradition of hiding the goods until a transfer of property has been officially arranged via marriage. A modern woman might balk at that association.

Cathedral length veils or floor length veils certainly are very elegant. This California bride looks pretty stunning in that veil. Pros: gorgeous. Cons: gets in the way while dancing or turning at all, might cause quite a problem in an outdoor wedding on a windy day.

Ah, the netting. This classy throwback to the mid 20th century works in a very contemporary way. The choice of black easily lends itself to a hipster feel, or you could choose traditional white like the bride in the first picture on our blog. Pros: no messy veil in windy conditions, nothing in the way of dancing, super classy. Cons: not actually a veil in the traditional sense, so you can’t include the moment where it is lifted into your ceremony

Elbow length veil or mid-length veil with blusher (or piece that goes in front of your face). This is probably the most popular option so far this season. Pros: Easy to include the lifting the veil moment in your ceremony. Veil in front of your face is mysterious and beautiful. Cons: Having two layers makes the veil poofier (this might be a pro if you like that)

One tier veils, that don’t cover the face are also a popular option. Usually Elbow, waist, or fingertip length, pros: still get that beautiful veil look without having netting in your face, usually attached with a comb that can be removed for dancing or other fun times later in the night. Also, your veil look can be more streamlined and less poofy. Cons: you don’t get that flipping the veil moment, or those pictures photographers love to take with both couples inside the veil.

Whatever you choose, be true to who you are. And of course, remember that Captured Emotions is happy to photograph any kind of veil you like.

Lisa and Tim have known each other since high school, but finally tied the knot last month. Here are a few pics from the wedding, and a few well wishes for a couple who has already proven their longevity, even though they are still newlyweds.

Lisa and Tim’s reception was at Gatherings in Cortland, NY

Congratulations on a beautiful day and your beautiful new life together. Thank you for sharing your day with us.